Looking Back to Validate and Confirm

Giving Themselves Permission To Take Risks

We had collected a full jar of coins for an offering.

And I had spilled it inside the car more than once, so it was time to get rid of it.

I handed it to John as he was hopping out of the car at our place of worship.

Ready to make his trek across the parking lot, all by himself as he has done for months now.

We had practiced saying in the car, “This is for the missionaries.”

(“Missionaries” is apparently not an easy word to say for some.)

Halfway to the church, he looked back at me (something he no longer does).

Lifted the canister, pointed at it, and nodded his head.

A combination of “I got this, Mom” and “Right, Mom?”

I gave him a nod back, and he was gone.

It all worked OK.

You see, he wanted to look back for joint attention, validation & confirmation.

These components of communication are what we seek with our kids.

It isn’t so much what they accomplish when we hover them.

But rather, it’s that they can think for themselves, take the risks, and transfer to their next encounter with life.

And in our world, it’s always the little things, the quick look of ever-brighter eyes.

Giving themselves permission to fail, to test, to try, to try again.

I hope this helps in your home.

Peace be with us,


I am a mom of learning differences, an educator and a former corporate warrior. I help you understand what to do to help your children with learning differences prepare for today so that they can be ready for life. I share with you all that I have learned. We always use a team to have fun and learn together.

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